南回归线N(6/20)

                                                                                               它没完没了，深不可测，这就是世上每一个人的命运，但尤其是我的命运……尤其是我的命运。又一次变形。
                                                                                                                                                                一切又摇晃倾斜起来。我又在梦中，梦见边界线那一边的痛苦、谵妄、快感、狂乱的梦。
                                                                                                                                                                我站在那块空地中央，但是我的家却看不见。我没有家。
                                                                                                                                                                梦是海市蜃楼。在空地中间绝没有一座房子。
                                                                                                                                                                这就是我之所以从未能够进入房子的原因。我的家不在这个世界上，而在来世。
                                                                                                                                                                我是一个没有家，没有朋友，没有妻子的人；我是一只属于尚不存在的现实的怪兽。啊，但是它是存在的，它将存在，我确信。
                                                                                                                                                                我现在低着头，走得飞快，一边还喃喃自语。我把幽会的事忘得一干二净，甚至没有注意到是否从她身边走过。
                                                                                                                                                                 也许我走过了。也许我正看着她，却没有认出她来。
                                                                                                                                                                也许她也没有认出我来。我疯了，痛苦得发疯，苦恼得发疯。
                                                                                                                                                                我绝望了，但是我不迷惘。不，有一个我所属于的现实。
                                                                   

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