第十五章虎踪(1/15)

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我给医院的保安逮住,给医生打了一剂镇静剂,才昏昏睡了。我给观察了两天,证实并非神经病,才放我走。
                                                                                                                                                                在医院的期间,我打探母老虎的下落。从护士的口里,我推测是母老虎的那个男人接了她走。
                                                                                                                                                                送她入院时,一丝不挂,里着毛毡子。有个男人带来衣服给她换上,把她带走。
                                                                                                                                                                我查问母老虎和胎儿的情况,她以私隐保密的理由不肯透露。我给放出来,马上开车到母老虎从前住过的地方去找,希望能得见母老虎一面,知道她母子是否平安就够了。
                                                                                                                                                                我在那里日夜不休的等,等了十多天,都看不见有人出入房子,还惹起邻居注意,以为我在那里徘徊游荡,意图不轨,报警把我赶走。在那里痴痴地等也不是办法,母老虎和那个男人如果不想见我,一定会搬走远遁。
                                                                                                                                                                毫无线索,何处去寻觅我那美娇娘呢?我失去盼望,萎靡不振。整天把自己困在房子里,墙壁贴满了母老虎的裸体照片。
                                                                                                                                                                甚至脱光衣服,坐在母老虎的笼子里,感受着坐在冰冷的铁条上的滋味。这样做,能使我和她拉得接近一点。
                                                                                                                                                                我的生活,就是不断地重播母老虎的录影带──给她洗身、脱腋毛、修剪阴毛、梳头、检查乳房、小穴和屁股,要她做健美体操,要她站着撒尿,甚至她吃饭拉屎睡觉都看完又看。当然,还有她和我在工作桌上、在我的单人床上、房子里任何摄录机可及的地方做爱的缠绵镜头,都叫我心里甜蜜温暖。
                                                                                                                                                                如果没有这些录影带,我已经会思念成狂了。几个月没付租金,房东把我赶走。
                                                                                                                 

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