第一章我是谁(1/16)

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最近我老做同样的梦,梦里有好多好多人,乱七八糟的。                                                                                                                                                                有多乱?太乱了。                                                                                                                                                                那些脸孔都曾经那么的熟悉,好象就是我生命中的一些故事,又好象不是。他们中有好多人都恨我,从那眼神里可以清楚地看出来。他们为什么恨我?我对他们干了什么?我实在弄不明白。也许是人上了年纪就都爱胡思乱想了吧?我还弄不明白是不是在回忆。这事儿困扰了我有好一段时间了,弄得我不大睡得好觉。有时候我真懒得去想了,不过有一件事情必须得想明白喽——我是谁?                                                                                                                                                                火堆一跳一跳的,火苗中好象又在幻变出那些奇怪的脸孔了,不清楚。                                                                                                                                                                说来也奇怪:一般我醒着的时候那些脸孔虽然也往外冒,但总没有睡觉的时候来得清楚;睡觉的时候很清楚,清楚得有点吓人,但醒来之后一切又变得模糊。                                                                                                                                                                模糊就模糊吧,我一点办法也没有。                                                                                                                                                                到底是谁把我弄成这样的?我为什么会这样?我是谁?                                                                                                                                                                好象有点记忆了——那是一个很漂亮的小丫头片子!                                                                                                                                                                她的确非常的漂亮,漂亮得使我这个自以为已经枯井不惊的男人也会……她是谁?                                                                                                                                                                外面好象是在下雨呢,下得很大的样子。还有风,风也很大,吹得这破庙都有点风雨飘摇的味道了。会不会倒掉?与其去想那些我实在头疼的事情,还不如关心一下眼前吧。怎么脑子还是不大好使?连干嘛要来这个破庙好象也有点想不起来了,那不就是刚刚发生的事情么?怎么好象就忘了?!以前的我好象不是这样的么,以前的我是个什么样子来的?嗨!又

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